The Random Thoughts Thread

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Tue Jul 05, 2016 5:39 pm

Longhorned wrote:I've decided that Halfway to Machaca would be the right title for my autobiography.

Mine will be "I Slept My Way to the Middle".

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Thu Jul 07, 2016 7:56 am

I'd like to mow the lawn in a onesie.

azgreg · Post by **azgreg** » Thu Jul 07, 2016 9:04 am

Like this one?

Or this one?

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Thu Jul 07, 2016 1:06 pm

The second one. The first one is way too warm for summer mowing.

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Fri Jul 08, 2016 9:50 am

Why does autocorrect think "butt laid" is somehow better than "buttload"?

azgreg · Post by **azgreg** » Tue Jul 12, 2016 9:30 am

A Florida woman fell 400 feet to her death at the Grand Canyon Friday. That's a long time to contemplate the bottom, damn.

scumdevils86 · Post by **scumdevils86** » Tue Jul 12, 2016 9:49 am

Well, it probably wasn't a smooth fall. Which I'm not sure if that makes it better or worse. Hopefully she was knocked out on the first blow.

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Tue Jul 12, 2016 3:40 pm

Two kids, who were probably 9 years old, knocked on my door asking for 20 bucks to mow my lawn. In the 1970s, yeah. Now? Hell no. I didn't feel like the parents or a judge would have any sympathy for me handing over my lawnmower to children who are destined to go limbless for the rest of their lives. I gave them 10 bucks to shut up and get lost.

Was I wrong?

wyo-cat · Post by **wyo-cat** » Tue Jul 12, 2016 4:16 pm

I used to charge $5.

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Tue Jul 12, 2016 5:25 pm

I like mowing my own lawn. It's an hour of peace.

azgreg · Post by **azgreg** » Tue Jul 12, 2016 5:30 pm

I was raised in a trailer park at Golf Links and Pantano. Nobody had a lawn. I made money doing cooler service. Clean them out, new pads, etc.

scumdevils86 · Post by **scumdevils86** » Fri Jul 15, 2016 12:13 pm

Mick Jagger is going to have a child that is several years younger than one of his great grandchildren.

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Wed Jul 27, 2016 10:12 am

If one day you decided to tweet out congratulations to Vladimir Putin for have the courage to come out as gay, and you got retweeted like wildfire to the point it was thought perhaps to be true, what are the chances you'd be killed?

ASUHATER! · Post by **ASUHATER!** » Wed Jul 27, 2016 12:15 pm

Longhorned wrote:If one day you decided to tweet out congratulations to Vladimir Putin for have the courage to come out as gay, and you got retweeted like wildfire to the point it was thought perhaps to be true, what are the chances you'd be killed?

Not huge...but certainly not tiny. He's probably had people killed for less.

Merkin · Post by **Merkin** » Wed Jul 27, 2016 12:51 pm

Chicat wrote:I like mowing my own lawn. It's an hour of peace.

I love mowing my lawn so much I spent weeks taking it out and putting in rocks.

And this was pre-drought.

My youngest son used to cut the grass, and moved out, so the grass had to go.

I think perhaps being in Cali and having to take care of it all year round might have something to do with it.

ANGCatFan · Post by **ANGCatFan** » Fri Jul 29, 2016 7:24 pm

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Fri Jul 29, 2016 7:32 pm

That's really cool, ACF

ASUHATER! · Post by **ASUHATER!** » Fri Jul 29, 2016 8:18 pm

ANGCatFan wrote:

I thought it was more than that.go to your average union civil war encampment and you'd probably hear people speaking several different languages from Gaelic to Swedish to Italian

wyo-cat · Post by **wyo-cat** » Fri Jul 29, 2016 8:58 pm

I remember walking around Shiloh battlefield and seeing all of the impressive state monuments to honor their dead. I was told that a lot of the Midwest states had a high number of fresh off the boat immigrants that had recently settled and fought for the Union. It was a sight to see.

azgreg · Post by **azgreg** » Thu Aug 04, 2016 12:10 pm

Merkin · Post by **Merkin** » Sat Aug 06, 2016 7:19 pm

scumdevils86 wrote:I just counted 33 mattress firms in the Tucson area. dafuq.

Someone posted this on Facebook, near Grant and Swan.

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Sat Aug 06, 2016 7:28 pm

There's also 3 on the corner of 22nd and Harrison.

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Sat Aug 06, 2016 7:55 pm

In Chicago I think I saw a Starbucks close to become a Mattress Firm.

The funny thing is that I need a new mattress. But damned if I'm going to give in and fund the mattress lobby's insane expansion. So I'll just continue sleeping on mine that's giving me back problems. Fuck them.

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Sun Aug 07, 2016 2:46 pm

ghostwhitehorse · Post by **ghostwhitehorse** » Sun Aug 07, 2016 4:24 pm

Chicat wrote:

The lack of follow up tweets is . . . disappointing.

Merkin · Post by **Merkin** » Sun Aug 07, 2016 4:27 pm

ghostwhitehorse wrote:
Chicat wrote:
The lack of follow up tweets is . . . disappointing.

Seriously.

I wear cargo shorts 7 days a week from spring to fall. I need all the pockets at my advanced age. Keys, cell phone, wallet, reading glasses. Once I started having back problems moved my wallet from back pocket to front pocket.

Just wondering what I turned into.

ANGCatFan · Post by **ANGCatFan** » Sun Aug 07, 2016 5:40 pm

Started having hip pain 5 years ago. Stopped sitting on my wallet and hips returned to normal.

I wish someone had told me years ago - don't sit on your wallet. It's better to have someone make fun of your cargo pants than be in constant pain.

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Sun Aug 07, 2016 6:06 pm

Merkin wrote:
ghostwhitehorse wrote:
Chicat wrote:
The lack of follow up tweets is . . . disappointing.
Seriously.

I wear cargo shorts 7 days a week from spring to fall. I need all the pockets at my advanced age. Keys, cell phone, wallet, reading glasses. Once I started having back problems moved my wallet from back pocket to front pocket.

Just wondering what I turned into.

What you say isn't true. You've simply decided to forego the murse.

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Sun Aug 07, 2016 6:19 pm

ghostwhitehorse wrote:
Chicat wrote:
The lack of follow up tweets is . . . disappointing.

But that lede.....

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Sun Aug 07, 2016 8:30 pm

This account has but one tweet...

gumby · Post by **gumby** » Sun Aug 07, 2016 10:50 pm

wyo-cat wrote:I remember walking around Shiloh battlefield and seeing all of the impressive state monuments to honor their dead. I was told that a lot of the Midwest states had a high number of fresh off the boat immigrants that had recently settled and fought for the Union. It was a sight to see.

Built the rail lines, too.

Puerco · Post by **Puerco** » Mon Aug 08, 2016 1:27 am

So, the Summer Olymics have begun. In Brazil. Where it's winter.

azgreg · Post by **azgreg** » Tue Aug 09, 2016 12:01 pm

My company handed out voluntary early retirement packets to anybody 60 and over last week. Today they laid off 8 guys. Not a fun day.

scumdevils86 · Post by **scumdevils86** » Tue Aug 09, 2016 12:18 pm

what kind of a package did they get.

azgreg · Post by **azgreg** » Tue Aug 09, 2016 12:20 pm

scumdevils86 wrote:what kind of a package did they get.

The only part of the package I heard was $500 per year in service with the company.

scumdevils86 · Post by **scumdevils86** » Tue Aug 09, 2016 12:48 pm

damn that's not very much. 15 years gets you 7500...that will get most people through 2 or 3 months. my dad has to worry about his job disappearing every summer with the new fiscal year and he has 9 years till he can fully retire. he also has a lot of expensive health problems and it really is shitty that we always have to stress about whether he will be able to have a job and insurance. he's worked hard his entire life and he could just be fucked in an instant.

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Wed Aug 10, 2016 7:44 am

I've discovered the answer to the age-old mystery of childhood amnesia - the obliteration of all memories from before the age 3-4:

It's so you don't have to go through life with the memory of the sound of your parents having sex while you slept in the same room with them.

CalStateTempe · Post by **CalStateTempe** » Wed Aug 10, 2016 8:39 am

Sexy time at LH house last night?

Thumbs up, it took us about 8mo to get back in the game post baby birth.

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Wed Aug 10, 2016 9:54 am

CalStateTempe wrote:Sexy time at LH house last night?

Thumbs up, it took us about 8mo to get back in the game post baby birth.

We also had a delay due to getting ripped open and sewn up again on the inside. But now it's mostly the fact of so much to do at night after the baby gets in bed, no time for makin' whoopie. Unless you plan for it and make other sacrifices.

azgreg · Post by **azgreg** » Wed Aug 10, 2016 10:07 am

scumdevils86 wrote:damn that's not very much. 15 years gets you 7500...that will get most people through 2 or 3 months. my dad has to worry about his job disappearing every summer with the new fiscal year and he has 9 years till he can fully retire. he also has a lot of expensive health problems and it really is shitty that we always have to stress about whether he will be able to have a job and insurance. he's worked hard his entire life and he could just be fucked in an instant.

A little more detail. 2.5% of last years salary + $500 per year of service max 20 years. So it you made $50,000 last year and worked here for 20 years you would get $11,250. Not enough for me.

scumdevils86 · Post by **scumdevils86** » Wed Aug 10, 2016 10:13 am

yeah that's rough. especially if you're only 60 and have 5-7 years before you can max out on SS retirement. getting 3 months salary as a retirement package isn't really going to cut it.

CalStateTempe · Post by **CalStateTempe** » Wed Aug 10, 2016 11:33 am

Longhorned wrote:
CalStateTempe wrote:Sexy time at LH house last night?

Thumbs up, it took us about 8mo to get back in the game post baby birth.
We also had a delay due to getting ripped open and sewn up again on the inside. But now it's mostly the fact of so much to do at night after the baby gets in bed, no time for makin' whoopie. Unless you plan for it and make other sacrifices.

Yup same here, re: the delay.

Childbirth looks like hell.

azgreg · Post by **azgreg** » Wed Aug 10, 2016 11:40 am

CalStateTempe wrote:Childbirth looks like hell.

Not the magic some would like you to believe huh?

azgreg · Post by **azgreg** » Thu Aug 11, 2016 2:35 pm

So, one of the guys let go the other day worked in part mark/shipping. Guess where I worked today? That's right, part mark/shipping, because they were short handed. smh

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Sun Aug 14, 2016 4:32 pm

He was born in 1790.

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Tue Aug 16, 2016 5:12 pm

I think we can turn off the internet now...

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Tue Aug 16, 2016 7:55 pm

I agree.

Merkin · Post by **Merkin** » Wed Aug 17, 2016 7:40 am

UAEebs86 wrote:He was born in 1790.

http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/20 ... alive.html" target="_blank

It’s a really interesting story that you’re still, you know, around. Could you just explain how this happened? How someone born in 1790 still has living grandchildren?

Well, he was a good man! [laughs] Both my grandfather — the president — and my father, were married twice. And they had children by their first wives. And their first wives died, and they married again and had more children. And my father was 75 when I was born, his father was 63 when he was born.

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Sat Aug 20, 2016 2:39 pm

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Sat Aug 20, 2016 5:07 pm

Random thought: Would you eat a banana if just the outer skin touched Randy Quaid's penis?

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