Bear Down Wildcats

UAEebs86 wrote:

scumdevils86 wrote:

Spaceman Spiff wrote:

CalStateTempe wrote:I'm a two dump a day type of guy.

In 630 am after the morning workout and coffee.
Between 2-3 pm to get me over the hump and into the last 1.5hr of work.

Sucks for the wife; she's trained for like 3am.

I have IBS. I'd kill for only 2 dumps a day and a relatively settled stomach.

That's how much dignity I have left.

In terms of random thoughts, some people get all weird about discussing boweling. I've never seen the point of that. Yeah, you don't need to offer it unsolicited, but if the conversation goes there, it's as close to a universal topic as you can get.

Everybody poops.

Except Kim Jong Un

I see.

CalStateTempe wrote: Between 2-3 pm to get me over the hump and into the last 1.5hr of work.

I'm like the SBB/CFF/FFS.

azgreg wrote:

scumdevils86 wrote:Dunno how but my body is trained for about 930-1000 am dumps. Wish it was later to break up the day more.

I take a dump everyday at 4:00 AM, unfortunately I don't wake up until 4:30.

Now that's some funny shit.

Spaceman Spiff wrote:

CalStateTempe wrote:I'm a two dump a day type of guy.

In 630 am after the morning workout and coffee.
Between 2-3 pm to get me over the hump and into the last 1.5hr of work.

Sucks for the wife; she's trained for like 3am.

I have IBS. I'd kill for only 2 dumps a day and a relatively settled stomach.

That's how much dignity I have left.

In terms of random thoughts, some people get all weird about discussing boweling. I've never seen the point of that. Yeah, you don't need to offer it unsolicited, but if the conversation goes there, it's as close to a universal topic as you can get.

This is so true. I had some issues that led to a surgery to remove a mass in my colon. Up to that point, I had colitis-like outbreaks. A couple that hospitalized me. Since the surgery 7 years ago, nothing. But when I was in the mess, especially around my surgery, if any discussion at all drifted to that very, very significant, painful, and awful period of my life, friends would freak out. "nononoNONONO...Don't talk about that. Damn."

Why? I am not discussing the coloring and shape/scent of my poo. I am not discussing the post operative care. But this happened to me. It was significant. It has some funny stories, actually, associated to it. But even a slight veer toward something that happened related to this surgery, like something totally unrelated to the functional parts like how I had to go to security in my office like 5 times during the outbreak for leaving my phone in the bathroom, and it is met with sudden barriers and freaking out.

It is just shit. And I am not so insensitive to actually talk about my shit. Just the very real and life impacting things that were happening. If they broke an arm and a bone popped out and bled and they could see all the way into their muscle and stuff, that's cool conversation. But talking about my continuous phone retention issues related to my colitis-like outbreak that put me in that room 10 times a day for about 6 months, and holyshitwearenottalkingaboutthis.

Even a colonoscopy is treated like you are talking about someone's mom. It's a medical procedure. You are out. It doesn't hurt. The prep hurts, but not that.

I really think it is, in part, related to guys intense homophobia, and association of anything ass related with gay sex. "Fuck that scope shit...my door is exit only." Yeah...OK. Have fun with colon cancer, SuperStraightMan.

I'm cool with discussing the color/shape/scent of poop. My wife is also nearly a nurse now (and spent the better part of decade in childcare) so it really has no boundaries.

scumdevils86 wrote:I'm cool with discussing the color/shape/scent of poop. My wife is also nearly a nurse now (and spent the better part of decade in childcare) so it really has no boundaries.

My wife had colitis and I've got IBS. We compare turd output and quality all the time.

I also naturally breathe and I don't see anyone worrying when I talk about that. We've all dropped a sweaty grunter that felt like losing 5 pounds. It's called a fact of life.

Evcat, my condolences. You ever want to talk s**t, feel free. When life gives you poop, make poop juice.

$2 for a single red rose for your wife is the best use of $2 you'll ever have.

azgreg wrote:$2 for a single red rose for your wife is the best use of $2 you'll ever have.

Sure, maybe if she's a woman.

All y'all squatters, standers or sitters??

77HoyaCat4Ever wrote:All y'all squatters, standers or sitters??

I usually just lie face down.

77HoyaCat4Ever wrote:All y'all squatters, standers or sitters??

We have a whole thread for that somewhere around here.

77HoyaCat4Ever wrote:All y'all squatters, standers or sitters??

I use the Superman maneuver.

azgreg wrote:

77HoyaCat4Ever wrote:All y'all squatters, standers or sitters??

I use the Superman maneuver.

You use a phone booth?

UAEebs86 wrote:

azgreg wrote:

77HoyaCat4Ever wrote:All y'all squatters, standers or sitters??

I use the Superman maneuver.

You use a phone booth?

Anyone else lose their focus when news channels, especially CNN, load up on four and five onscreen "experts" for the same segment?

Reminds me of this brief but hilarious segment at 2:54:

Over the course of expansive time, you watch emergency vehicles come to retrieve your neighbors' bodies until yours is the only old body left in the neighborhood, and all the newbies part their curtains and look at your house when the next siren blares.

77HoyaCat4Ever wrote:All y'all squatters, standers or sitters??

For all the ranting about "fake news," the biggest problem with news is sensationalism. The 24 hour cycle and ratings battle has pretty well sucked out any actual analysis and replaced it with pandering to the audience's preconceptions and trying to deliver constant bombshells.

Chicat wrote:

azgreg wrote:

scumdevils86 wrote:Dunno how but my body is trained for about 930-1000 am dumps. Wish it was later to break up the day more.

I take a dump everyday at 4:00 AM, unfortunately I don't wake up until 4:30.

Now that's some funny shit.

I shit more than I eat. As long as we're on the subject.

dovecanyoncat wrote:I shit more than I eat. As long as we're on the subject.

I'd see a doctor about that rather quickly. As my Gramma used to say, "you'll dry up and blow away".

RichardCranium wrote:

dovecanyoncat wrote:I shit more than I eat. As long as we're on the subject.

I'd see a doctor about that rather quickly. As my Gramma used to say, "you'll dry up and blow away".

"But Gramma my eyes are still brown. Won't that be the first thing to go?"

I only lived in The Big Easy for one year, but I am for sure requesting to be memorialized there when I pass on.

not entirely random but a hell of a day at work so far. someone was hauled off unconscious in an ambulance and the VP I had an interview with for a promotion yesterday afternoon...well we found out they are no longer with the company as of 10:30 this morning.

good times

scumdevils86 wrote:not entirely random but a hell of a day at work so far. someone was hauled off unconscious in an ambulance and the VP I had an interview with for a promotion yesterday afternoon...well we found out they are no longer with the company as of 10:30 this morning.

good times

I'd tell the new VP about all the promises the old guy made you...

yup this vp was hired about 6-7 years ago from a large corporate bank and totally transformed our corporate/sales/branch structure from top to bottom.

many other employees had interviews/check ins/performance reviews scheduled with this vp this week and next.

then they were gone in a *poof*

obviously no one was expecting this.

an an Ex V.P. myself, thats not a good sign in the middle of performance reviews.

just sayin...

yea no one is quite sure about what is happening with the job that i interviewed for. it is a short term "stretch" assignment that was supposed to begin in a week or two...

So I'm wondering who's got the most masculine name in the world. My nominees are both from high school where in one class we had a Rick Rock (who could've also gone with Dick Rock) and a Dick Hardman. Whatcha got to beat that?

Puerco wrote:So I'm wondering who's got the most masculine name in the world. My nominees are both from high school where in one class we had a Rick Rock (who could've also gone with Dick Rock) and a Dick Hardman. Whatcha got to beat that?

http://www.cracked.com/article_14982_th ... world.html" target="_blank

1) Staff Sgt. Max Fightmaster

Dude from highschool: Rod Buckmaster. Swear to God.

scumdevils86 wrote:yea no one is quite sure about what is happening with the job that i interviewed for. it is a short term "stretch" assignment that was supposed to begin in a week or two...

Look at it instead as there's now a VP position open for you.

legallykenny wrote:

scumdevils86 wrote:yea no one is quite sure about what is happening with the job that i interviewed for. it is a short term "stretch" assignment that was supposed to begin in a week or two...

Look at it instead as there's now a VP position open for you.

not qualified for it...and wouldn't even want it if i was. not really motivated by huge amounts of money and work stress and accomplishment. my passions lie outside of work!

azgreg wrote:

Puerco wrote:So I'm wondering who's got the most masculine name in the world. My nominees are both from high school where in one class we had a Rick Rock (who could've also gone with Dick Rock) and a Dick Hardman. Whatcha got to beat that?

http://www.cracked.com/article_14982_th ... world.html" target="_blank

1) Staff Sgt. Max Fightmaster

Pick any from this video, but put your faith in Blast Hardcheese.

catgrad97 wrote:

azgreg wrote:

Puerco wrote:So I'm wondering who's got the most masculine name in the world. My nominees are both from high school where in one class we had a Rick Rock (who could've also gone with Dick Rock) and a Dick Hardman. Whatcha got to beat that?

http://www.cracked.com/article_14982_th ... world.html" target="_blank

1) Staff Sgt. Max Fightmaster

Pick any from this video, but put your faith in Blast Hardcheese.

Best mst3k ever. Smoke Manmuscle! Brick Hardmeat! Stump Beefknob! Blast Hardcheese!

I'm having trouble deciding which of the Sharknado movies is my favorite.

azgreg wrote:I'm having trouble deciding which of the Sharknado movies is my favorite.

Whichever one where they refused to let Trump play the president. Some things are just way too unrealistic I guess.

The sheer breadth of things I am expected to have a working knowledge of in my current work position is mindboggling. There is no way around faking it to some extent

EVCat wrote:The sheer breadth of things I am expected to have a working knowledge of in my current work position is mindboggling. There is no way around faking it to some extent

Is this a Trump quote?

azgreg wrote:I'm having trouble deciding which of the Sharknado movies is my favorite.

See above.

Puerco wrote:So I'm wondering who's got the most masculine name in the world. My nominees are both from high school where in one class we had a Rick Rock (who could've also gone with Dick Rock) and a Dick Hardman. Whatcha got to beat that?

Dick Pound, IOC

Wolf Blitzer.

Rocco Domenico "Rocky" Colavito, Jr.
Bombo Rivera
Thor Heyerdahl
Punch Sulzberger (you know you want to)
Bear Gryllis
Nuke LaLoosh
Tank McNamara
Studs Terkel
Grizzly Adams

Is this another Hassan Adams moment?

"Is this a defection or are you just glad to see me?"

My wife went to this over the weekend with a couple of her friends in Sonoita.

http://azhopsandvines.com/baddecisions2017/" target="_blank

We’ve combined our two craziest events into one completely insane event: The Bad Decisions bacon, chocolate and booze campout and meteor shower. Wine by us, beer by our favorite local breweries and distilleries, food trucks, local restaurants, s’mores, astronomy geekery, camping, and tons of live bands and entertainment. Arizona’s biggest winery, brewery, and distillery festival! And since it’s an overnight campout, that means no DD required!
Holding to our fine tradition of pairing things that are unhealthily amazing (Cheetos, cupcakes), we are pairing chocolate, bacon, wine, and beer. We’ll also have tons of awesome food trucks. (Food is not included in the admission price).
The Perseids is one of the best meteor showers to observe, producing up to 60 meteors per hour at their peak. The shower will come from the northeast after about midnight. In the morning, we’ll all enjoy Fluffer mimosas!

She said she had a great time and now wants me to check on property values down there.

Wow

Tiger Woods had Vicodin, Dilaudid, Xanax, Ambien and THC (tetrahydrocannabinol) in his system when he was arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence in May, according to a toxicology report released Monday.

http://www.espn.com/golf/story/_/id/203 ... dui-arrest" target="_blank

SCCats wrote:Wow

Tiger Woods had Vicodin, Dilaudid, Xanax, Ambien and THC (tetrahydrocannabinol) in his system when he was arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence in May, according to a toxicology report released Monday.

http://www.espn.com/golf/story/_/id/203 ... dui-arrest" target="_blank

Sounds like a suicide attempt.