A co-op community for Arizona Fans
http://www.beardownwildcats.com/
azgreg wrote:Here I sit all broken hearted.Longhorned wrote:Never trust a fart.scumdevils86 wrote:Gee, I feel like I'm missing out here. Other than my run ins with the stomach flu at home I have never come close to shitting my pants in public.
.
Tried to shit but only farted.
Then I went to a chance.
Tried to fart, but shit my pants.
My Brother!Carcassdragger wrote: ↑Thu May 04, 2023 7:18 am I consider myself an expert at shitting outdoors.
The very best places are on a hillside with a view and on two rocks with a downslope V in between so as to lift and separate the butt cheeks.
Next preferred is one flat rock on which to set one butt cheek thereby providing some separation and a resting perch.
If in the sandy desert, a good choice is the horizontal tree branch hang This technique is performed after selecting a horizontal mesquite or ironwood branch at about chest level and hanging off from it using both arms. Quite comfortable and effective.
Some years ago, I purchased a bumper dumper which is a toilet seat sttached to the male part of a receiver hitch. Just choose a spot on a remote road, preferably with a view, plug in the bumper dumper and let er go while enjoying a nice sit down.
Regarding squatting when a toilet seat is available, I'll choose sitting-regardless of the sphincter area relief-as it provides a nice respite to get some reading done.
Also, another tip. Whenever possible, always shit at work. Why not get paid while performing this essential duty?
Extremely valuable and necessary contribution here.dovecanyoncat wrote: ↑Thu May 04, 2023 8:51 amMy Brother!Carcassdragger wrote: ↑Thu May 04, 2023 7:18 am I consider myself an expert at shitting outdoors.
The very best places are on a hillside with a view and on two rocks with a downslope V in between so as to lift and separate the butt cheeks.
Next preferred is one flat rock on which to set one butt cheek thereby providing some separation and a resting perch.
If in the sandy desert, a good choice is the horizontal tree branch hang This technique is performed after selecting a horizontal mesquite or ironwood branch at about chest level and hanging off from it using both arms. Quite comfortable and effective.
Some years ago, I purchased a bumper dumper which is a toilet seat sttached to the male part of a receiver hitch. Just choose a spot on a remote road, preferably with a view, plug in the bumper dumper and let er go while enjoying a nice sit down.
Regarding squatting when a toilet seat is available, I'll choose sitting-regardless of the sphincter area relief-as it provides a nice respite to get some reading done.
Also, another tip. Whenever possible, always shit at work. Why not get paid while performing this essential duty?
All our other BDW brethren are scratching their heads right now HAR! If all the above is not instinctive in your total body muscle memory when time comes to take a dump you're not a player!
One thing I might add to round out the nuances of shitting in the woods: Before the squat you simply must account for all your accoutrement. Belts, straps, harnesses, suspenders, tools attached to any of the foregoing MUST be kept out of the deposit zone prior to and on approach. Shit on your kit just once and you'll know what I mean.
When my wife was along she would read while I did plots. If she read aloud I needed her to omit reading out numbers as it fucked up my ability to keep a number series in my head before entering them into the data recorder. But there was a wonderful protracted moment of freedom when taking a dump and she could freely read to me.Carcassdragger wrote: ↑Thu May 04, 2023 7:18 am Regarding squatting when a toilet seat is available, I'll choose sitting-regardless of the sphincter area relief-as it provides a nice respite to get some reading done.
Also, another tip. Whenever possible, always shit at work. Why not get paid while performing this essential duty?
Carcassdragger wrote: ↑Thu May 04, 2023 8:56 amExtremely valuable and necessary contribution here.dovecanyoncat wrote: ↑Thu May 04, 2023 8:51 amMy Brother!Carcassdragger wrote: ↑Thu May 04, 2023 7:18 am I consider myself an expert at shitting outdoors.
The very best places are on a hillside with a view and on two rocks with a downslope V in between so as to lift and separate the butt cheeks.
Next preferred is one flat rock on which to set one butt cheek thereby providing some separation and a resting perch.
If in the sandy desert, a good choice is the horizontal tree branch hang This technique is performed after selecting a horizontal mesquite or ironwood branch at about chest level and hanging off from it using both arms. Quite comfortable and effective.
Some years ago, I purchased a bumper dumper which is a toilet seat sttached to the male part of a receiver hitch. Just choose a spot on a remote road, preferably with a view, plug in the bumper dumper and let er go while enjoying a nice sit down.
Regarding squatting when a toilet seat is available, I'll choose sitting-regardless of the sphincter area relief-as it provides a nice respite to get some reading done.
Also, another tip. Whenever possible, always shit at work. Why not get paid while performing this essential duty?
All our other BDW brethren are scratching their heads right now HAR! If all the above is not instinctive in your total body muscle memory when time comes to take a dump you're not a player!
One thing I might add to round out the nuances of shitting in the woods: Before the squat you simply must account for all your accoutrement. Belts, straps, harnesses, suspenders, tools attached to any of the foregoing MUST be kept out of the deposit zone prior to and on approach. Shit on your kit just once and you'll know what I mean.
Also, if in a remote location and you find that you've forgotten to bring a wipe roll, know that if the weather is warm, you can rip the sleeves off your shirt. This taught to me by a buddy who returned to camp after his morning walk with no shirt sleeves.
I was an at work shitter when I was working. However, the biggest complaint was the industrial grade TP used. Single ply and sandpaper rough. At least they didn't have to worry about anyone stealing it during the TP shortage.Carcassdragger wrote: ↑Thu May 04, 2023 7:18 am Also, another tip. Whenever possible, always shit at work. Why not get paid while performing this essential duty?
Not sure how far remote is remote, but I used to use tree leaves. Just like our frickin' ancestors.dovecanyoncat wrote: ↑Thu May 04, 2023 9:06 am
If you're really tidy, the pocket of a tee shirt will suffice. On my 1970s geo-physical crew all of us had tees with the pocket missing.
Merkin wrote: ↑Thu May 04, 2023 9:45 amCarcassdragger wrote: ↑Thu May 04, 2023 7:18 am Also, another tip. Whenever possible, always shit at work. Why not get paid while performing this essential duty?
At home I am a 100% Charmin Ultra Soft guy.
dovecanyoncat wrote: ↑Thu May 04, 2023 9:06 am
If you're really tidy, the pocket of a tee shirt will suffice. On my 1970s geo-physical crew all of us had tees with the pocket missing.
Mullein: all over the Rocky Mountain mixed conifer zone, is nature's Charmin Ultra Soft. And, when the seed stalk dries up and dies in Fall you can pull it up and throw the spear at your buds. *redneck dodgeball*
Invasive. I've expended a bit of resources to keep it at reasonable levels. I knew that, after introduction, it was used for quite a bit of medicinal purposes. Now I know of an essential use.dovecanyoncat wrote: ↑Thu May 04, 2023 10:09 amMerkin wrote: ↑Thu May 04, 2023 9:45 amCarcassdragger wrote: ↑Thu May 04, 2023 7:18 am Also, another tip. Whenever possible, always shit at work. Why not get paid while performing this essential duty?
At home I am a 100% Charmin Ultra Soft guy.dovecanyoncat wrote: ↑Thu May 04, 2023 9:06 am
If you're really tidy, the pocket of a tee shirt will suffice. On my 1970s geo-physical crew all of us had tees with the pocket missing.Mullein: all over the Rocky Mountain mixed conifer zone, is nature's Charmin Ultra Soft. And, when the seed stalk dries up and dies in Fall you can pull it up and throw the spear at your buds. *redneck dodgeball*
While pondering the intelligent and articulate musings on BDW, it's interesting to note that all of your thoughts here regularly help with stimulating movement.
Fukin' experts apparently never owned a cat...UAEebs86 wrote: ↑Sun Mar 17, 2024 9:06 am Over or under? Surprisingly, there actually is a 'correct' way to hang a toilet paper roll.
Let's settle this silly-but-surprisingly-heated debate once and for all.
https://www.upworthy.com/over-or-under- ... paper-roll
