Coronavirus League

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Mon Apr 13, 2020 3:21 pm

Longhorned wrote:Had a plumbing emergency in our house. What was I supposed to do? Live without running water? Or bring a plumber in the house to spread his virus all over us? It was a tough call.

He made my wife help him while I was teaching my class on Zoom. And then she couldn't wash her hands because the water was off. Her hands are now all over her face like you wouldn't believe.

Now I get to drown in anxiety.

He's been here seven and a half hours so far, still working away. If he's a silent carrier, I doubt anything can be done.

Merkin · Post by **Merkin** » Mon Apr 13, 2020 3:39 pm

Longhorned wrote: He's been here seven and a half hours so far, still working away. If he's a silent carrier, I doubt anything can be done.

Just wait to you get his bill!

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Mon Apr 13, 2020 3:57 pm

Merkin wrote:
Longhorned wrote: He's been here seven and a half hours so far, still working away. If he's a silent carrier, I doubt anything can be done.

Just wait to you get his bill!

I agreed to the price before he started.

But man, if anybody has the virus, it's this guy. Absolutely no awareness of physical distancing. Thought he'd be nice and hand me my mail while I was eating a sandwich. I think we just need to get lucky and hope that he's never encountered the virus, because he couldn't care less.

When he was done he said, “Ugh, I’m tired. Why am I so tired? I’m really really tired.” And then he sat down on the toilet.

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Tue Apr 14, 2020 5:50 pm

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Thu Apr 16, 2020 9:50 am

Alieberman · Post by **Alieberman** » Thu Apr 16, 2020 9:54 am

Longhorned wrote:
Merkin wrote:
Longhorned wrote: He's been here seven and a half hours so far, still working away. If he's a silent carrier, I doubt anything can be done.

Just wait to you get his bill!
I agreed to the price before he started.

But man, if anybody has the virus, it's this guy. Absolutely no awareness of physical distancing. Thought he'd be nice and hand me my mail while I was eating a sandwich. I think we just need to get lucky and hope that he's never encountered the virus, because he couldn't care less.

When he was done he said, “Ugh, I’m tired. Why am I so tired? I’m really really tired.” And then he sat down on the toilet.

I should have given you the name of our plumber. He's great , fast, reasonable $$$ , probably virus free and he's never sat on my toilet.

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Thu Apr 16, 2020 11:25 am

Alieberman wrote:
Longhorned wrote:
Merkin wrote:
Longhorned wrote: He's been here seven and a half hours so far, still working away. If he's a silent carrier, I doubt anything can be done.

Just wait to you get his bill!
I agreed to the price before he started.

But man, if anybody has the virus, it's this guy. Absolutely no awareness of physical distancing. Thought he'd be nice and hand me my mail while I was eating a sandwich. I think we just need to get lucky and hope that he's never encountered the virus, because he couldn't care less.

When he was done he said, “Ugh, I’m tired. Why am I so tired? I’m really really tired.” And then he sat down on the toilet.
I should have given you the name of our plumber. He's great , fast, reasonable $$$ , probably virus free and he's never sat on my toilet.

Please, Commissioner! Share his name here in the Coronavirus League thread. If anybody is going keep your plumber employed while virus-clean, it's the people who follow the league where everyone hopes to come in last place.

Plumbing stuff could happen to anyone while isolating. It's really important to be ready.

Don't hire Wesley from Southern Arizona Plumbing.

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Thu Apr 16, 2020 1:13 pm

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Thu Apr 16, 2020 1:32 pm

UAEebs86 wrote:

And the CDC says smoking weed makes it worse.

It’s like everyone is trying to ruin my life.

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Thu Apr 16, 2020 2:21 pm

Going into battle drunk doesn't sharpen your battle skills, but there's a reason why soldiers were made to drink before arming themselves. I'd say pandemic isolation without alcohol is like, "Go sleep outside. No! Don't bring a tent and a sleeping bag! Just lay on the gravel."

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Sat Apr 25, 2020 12:28 pm

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Sat Apr 25, 2020 1:57 pm

Cousin Essential

ASUHATER! · Post by **ASUHATER!** » Sat Apr 25, 2020 2:23 pm

Kid Sanitizer...

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Sun Apr 26, 2020 7:41 am

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Mon Apr 27, 2020 11:23 am

I’ve developed a new game for my weekly trip to the supermarket.

It’s...... SPOT THE FLU KLUX KLANNER!

Some things to look out for...

- Not wearing a mask
- Sneers at the disinfecting wipes as he grabs his cart
- Looks generally angry for no reason
- Mutters “fuckin hoax” or “fuckin pussies” or “lib cucks” under his breath as he walks by anyone wearing a mask
- Reaches within 6 inches of your head to grab the generic Miracle Whip
- Has an insane number of mass produced domestic lagers and frozen pepperoni pizzas in his cart
- Is wearing a dirty tshirt with some combination of the US flag, a bald eagle, an AR-14, and an explosion
- Says something about one-way aisles being Communism
- Bypasses the fresh fruits and vegetables sections like they all carry AIDS
- Uses your sleeve as a tissue
- Is eating a bag of Doritos as he shops
- Has a sticker on the back window of his truck showing Calvin pissing into Hillary’s mouth

CalStateTempe · Post by **CalStateTempe** » Mon Apr 27, 2020 11:35 am

Yes!!!

I want to expand this game. We could make it like a pdf bingo card!

Spot the flu klux klanner!

I applaud you sir!

Alieberman · Post by **Alieberman** » Mon Apr 27, 2020 11:47 am

Chicat wrote:I’ve developed a new game for my weekly trip to the supermarket.

It’s...... SPOT THE FLU KLUX KLANNER!

Some things to look out for...

- Not wearing a mask
- Sneers at the disinfecting wipes as he grabs his cart
- Looks generally angry for no reason
- Mutters “fuckin hoax” or “fuckin pussies” or “lib cucks” under his breath as he walks by anyone wearing a mask
- Reaches within 6 inches of your head to grab the generic Miracle Whip
- Has an insane number of mass produced domestic lagers and frozen pepperoni pizzas in his cart
- Is wearing a dirty tshirt with some combination of the US flag, a bald eagle, an AR-14, and an explosion
- Says something about one-way aisles being Communism
- Bypasses the fresh fruits and vegetables sections like they all carry AIDS
- Uses your sleeve as a tissue
- Is eating a bag of Doritos as he shops
- Has a sticker on the back window of his truck showing Calvin pissing into Hillary’s mouth

So funny yet so sad because we've all seen this guy.

ASUHATER! · Post by **ASUHATER!** » Mon Apr 27, 2020 11:48 am

One way aisles are something I haven't seen before but make perfect sense even in non virus times

CalStateTempe · Post by **CalStateTempe** » Mon Apr 27, 2020 12:11 pm

It is really a sign of times in Murcia that me wearing a mask for my own and others safety is perceived as being complicit with the “librul agenda”

That said I proudly wear my mask around these ignorant uncaring idiots. Like the MAGA hat, the non masked people have declared their intentions and political sympathies.

Good, glad to know who to avoid.

ASUHATER! · Post by **ASUHATER!** » Mon Apr 27, 2020 12:14 pm

I still wouldn't judge people without masks completely. They're still really hard to get and poorer and unconnected people have a almost impossible uphill path to even acquire a mask. Along with being able to work from home and social distance, having a mask is generally a sign of privilege.

PHXCATS · Post by **PHXCATS** » Mon Apr 27, 2020 12:14 pm

ASUHATER! wrote:One way aisles are something I haven't seen before but make perfect sense even in non virus times

Except no people follow it at the store I go to. Fucking idiots

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Mon Apr 27, 2020 12:27 pm

CalStateTempe wrote:

Yes!!!

I want to expand this game. We could make it like a pdf bingo card!

I welcome any and all additions and suggestions.

CalStateTempe · Post by **CalStateTempe** » Mon Apr 27, 2020 1:59 pm

ASUHATER! wrote:I still wouldn't judge people without masks completely. They're still really hard to get and poorer and unconnected people have a almost impossible uphill path to even acquire a mask. Along with being able to work from home and social distance, having a mask is generally a sign of privilege.

In my part of town where I shop, people who don’t wear masks are being obstinate and trumpy.

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Mon Apr 27, 2020 2:33 pm

Literally all you need is two rubber bands and a cloth rag, or a cloth napkin, or any other piece of cloth.

azgreg · Post by **azgreg** » Mon Apr 27, 2020 3:19 pm

Longhorned wrote:Literally all you need is two rubber bands and a cloth rag, or a cloth napkin, or any other piece of cloth.

CatsbyAZ · Post by **CatsbyAZ** » Tue Apr 28, 2020 7:23 am

Alieberman wrote: So funny yet so sad because we've all seen this guy.

And we've all had to hear him blasting Motorhead

Merkin · Post by **Merkin** » Tue Apr 28, 2020 12:12 pm

Longhorned wrote:Literally all you need is two rubber bands and a cloth rag, or a cloth napkin, or any other piece of cloth.

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Sun May 03, 2020 8:34 am

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Thu May 07, 2020 10:10 am

PHXCATS · Post by **PHXCATS** » Thu May 07, 2020 10:49 am

UAEebs86 wrote:

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Fri May 08, 2020 2:37 pm

CalStateTempe · Post by **CalStateTempe** » Fri May 08, 2020 3:00 pm

PHXCATS wrote:
UAEebs86 wrote:

Gnarly!

Team praying mantis

azgreg · Post by **azgreg** » Fri May 08, 2020 3:26 pm

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Sat May 09, 2020 7:53 pm

Longhorned wrote:
Merkin wrote:
Longhorned wrote: He's been here seven and a half hours so far, still working away. If he's a silent carrier, I doubt anything can be done.

Just wait to you get his bill!
I agreed to the price before he started.

But man, if anybody has the virus, it's this guy. Absolutely no awareness of physical distancing. Thought he'd be nice and hand me my mail while I was eating a sandwich. I think we just need to get lucky and hope that he's never encountered the virus, because he couldn't care less.

When he was done he said, “Ugh, I’m tired. Why am I so tired? I’m really really tired.” And then he sat down on the toilet.

The Trumpy plumber had to come back because the 8-hour job he did was a total failure. I greeted him with a face mask and he did a "one of those librul types" roll-eyes. I sanitized the shit out of the bathroom after he left.

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Tue May 12, 2020 3:23 pm

So since my brother-in-law (who I was living with) and I both tested positive for antibodies, looks like I had the 'rona back in late March. (just a bad cold for me)

Does that make me the C-League leader? I see Dosia coming up on the outside and about to pass me though.

Alieberman · Post by **Alieberman** » Tue May 12, 2020 3:35 pm

UAEebs86 wrote:So since my brother-in-law (who I was living with) and I both tested positive for antibodies, looks like I had the 'rona back in late March. (just a bad cold for me)

Does that make me the C-League leader? I see Dosia coming up on the outside and about to pass me though.

You had it AND with limited symptoms?

You are the fucking king!

We have a new Commish!!!

Oh and congrats!

azgreg · Post by **azgreg** » Tue May 12, 2020 3:56 pm

UAEebs86 wrote:So since my brother-in-law (who I was living with) and I both tested positive for antibodies, looks like I had the 'rona back in late March. (just a bad cold for me)

Does that make me the C-League leader? I see Dosia coming up on the outside and about to pass me though.

Run up Mt. Lemmon and let us know how your lungs are.

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Tue May 12, 2020 4:00 pm

azgreg wrote:
UAEebs86 wrote:So since my brother-in-law (who I was living with) and I both tested positive for antibodies, looks like I had the 'rona back in late March. (just a bad cold for me)

Does that make me the C-League leader? I see Dosia coming up on the outside and about to pass me though.
Run up Mt. Lemmon and let us know how your lungs are.

I was doing some bike riding in Boulder about 4 weeks ago and I was sucking wind bad. Thought it was just altitude and being out of shape but now I wonder.

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Tue May 12, 2020 4:08 pm

You’re amazing!

I’d still swim with a great white shark if it would give me antibodies.

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Tue May 12, 2020 5:20 pm

Alieberman wrote:
UAEebs86 wrote:So since my brother-in-law (who I was living with) and I both tested positive for antibodies, looks like I had the 'rona back in late March. (just a bad cold for me)

Does that make me the C-League leader? I see Dosia coming up on the outside and about to pass me though.
You had it AND with limited symptoms?

You are the fucking king!

We have a new Commish!!!

Oh and congrats!

Eebs walks into Coronavirus League...

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Thu May 21, 2020 5:48 pm

UAEebs86 wrote:So since my brother-in-law (who I was living with) and I both tested positive for antibodies, looks like I had the 'rona back in late March. (just a bad cold for me)

Does that make me the C-League leader? I see Dosia coming up on the outside and about to pass me though.

My sister's antibody test came back positive as well. (All 3 of us in the house were sick at the same time). Three different test types in 3 different locations.

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Thu May 21, 2020 7:16 pm

UAEebs86 wrote:
UAEebs86 wrote:So since my brother-in-law (who I was living with) and I both tested positive for antibodies, looks like I had the 'rona back in late March. (just a bad cold for me)

Does that make me the C-League leader? I see Dosia coming up on the outside and about to pass me though.

My sister's antibody test came back positive as well. (All 3 of us in the house were sick at the same time). Three different test types in 3 different locations.

I thought we were all supposed to have nightmarish hallucinations... followed by scary breathing issues... followed by a visit to hospital where we endure kidney failure and a heart attack... followed by intubation where maybe, just maybe we come off the ventilator if we're very, very lucky and live in a diminished state until we die of collateral damage at the age of 53.

I'm convinced that's my fate when I catch it.

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Wed May 27, 2020 11:57 am

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Thu May 28, 2020 8:24 am

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Thu May 28, 2020 8:31 am

But they probably came to the restaurant together. That makes zero sense to me.

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Thu May 28, 2020 9:41 am

Chicat wrote:But they probably came to the restaurant together. That makes zero sense to me.

I'd want to know if they can hear each other. If hearing isn't a problem, I think it's great because it protects everyone and maximizes the space. It seems like the point is to replace the face mask while eating and drinking.

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Thu May 28, 2020 10:05 am

Longhorned wrote:
Chicat wrote:But they probably came to the restaurant together. That makes zero sense to me.
I'd want to know if they can hear each other. If hearing isn't a problem, I think it's great because it protects everyone and maximizes the space. It seems like the point is to replace the face mask while eating and drinking.

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Thu May 28, 2020 11:43 am

No, that one is just awkward, difficult, and unhygenic.

ByJoveByJingle · Post by **ByJoveByJingle** » Thu May 28, 2020 11:52 am

Amateurs.

[/quote]

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